memory keepers

Some moments are so precious that you are sure that you'll never forget them, until time passes and there you are, trying to remember whatever it was that you forgot. Gosh. The sweetest moments become lost in a fog of days that turn into years. Too many moments have gone by that I didn't write down. When I was a new mama I had started a journal, written to my daughter, about some of the sweet little things that she said or did. (In our recent move, she found the journal and spent the evening reading it and laughing. It was kind of surreal watching her reading it. When I wrote it I never really thought that far ahead to her actually having it in her hands reading it all. Aren't babies supposed to stay babies?! Bananas! It was pretty special.) I started another journal, written to my second daughter after she was born and barely wrote anything. By the time the third and fourth child came along, my high ideals of journaling special notes to them quickly became a hope that I never seemed to have the time to actually do. I would write to one child, feel guilty if I wasn't also writing to another and then feel exhausted at just the thought of writing to each one separately. I thought of writing a journal that was for the family of little moments to remember but again, I think I just dropped the ball and lost momentum on it. Social media was a super easy way to quickly document little moments that were fun to look back on, especially with the kids. They always love to hear stories of things they did or said. But I've stepped away from social media for awhile now, which has been really beautiful, but with the good comes the loss of the quick records of life with my littles. I do miss that, and start to wonder if I should get back on the social media bandwagon again. We'll see. And this blog of mine is so hit and miss for me. I always have so much on my heart and mind to say (or write) but in the midst of the busyness of my life right now, time alone to write is pretty slim. I wish I could document our family better but some things, I suppose, will have to be kept only in my heart and mind to hopefully share with my children later in life when I'm old and grey and reminiscing of the years gone by. 

So before I forget:

My Max recently fell off his chair during dinner and bit through his tongue. Like a nasty, bloody, horribleness of sadness from a chunk of tongue-flesh flopping around in the center of his tongue. It looked like a tongue piercing gone wrong. Anyhoo, from that night on, he's slept on a little mat next to my bed every night and I have LOVED every minute of having a baby close by to peek at and hear breathing through the night. I LOVE babies and the ones that are mine are just pure heaven to watch when they are sleeping. I've said this before but I think in heaven that I'll be holding sleeping babies for eternity. :0) Just kidding, but it does sound pretty perfect to me! Gimme all the babies forever! Anyways, back on to Max. He will wake in the night and only find comfort when I'm holding him. He'll ask me to snuggle him or to hold him like a baby. Ummmm, of course I will!! And he'll wake up in the morning all groggy and grumpy and look over at me in bed, which by that time I'm usually sipping coffee under my blankets and reading my bible, hair all in a jamble and clearly no make-up on, and he'll say, "Hi mama. You look boo-tiful… I love you so much…" in his cutest, grumpiest and most serious of voices. Oh how wonderful it is to be a mama. 

My Uly D. What a rad little man he is. He is tough and so tender all mixed into one. He has been my most challenging child at times and yet his ability to melt my heart into a giant puddle of love is pretty incredible. He had a slower start in his speech and so now that he speaks all the time I find myself all goggly eyed as I watch him talk. To hear the things that he thinks is a sweet gift that I don't take for granted. He and I have really grown in our relationship since I've been full time home and my heart wants to burst and truly praise the Lord for what HE has done. That's probably another post to share. But the short story is that I've watched the Lord bring so much change and goodness into our home since taking the step of faith to be home and God has especially done wonders in my Uly. So amazing to watch. He's just a precious little love and he swings his arms around me all day and tells me how much he loves me. He'll say, " I love you too much. I wish to marry you!" He prays for me and  he LOVES for me to pray for him and snuggle him. I'm a smitten kitten for that boy. The other day he asked his Daddy a question and before he could answer him he says, " Dad, just ask yourself in your body and it will tell you yes or no." How cool is that?! What a funny way to think about how we make decisions! I love how kids think!

My Scarlett Hopey is like a burst of sunshine mixed with loads of joy and happiness. She finds pure delight in the simplest things. When everyone else ducks their heads in the rain and gripes about getting wet, she squeals with excitement and can see the beauty in it all! She is a gift in this world. She always wants to go on dates with me or her Daddy. The other day she had slept in and then came over to me in my room and jumped on my bed and said, "Do you know why I've been in bed so long?… I was staring at the picture of us on our date and thinking about how much fun that was! I want to go on another date with you again, like old times." So stinking precious! She also recently said to me, "Do you know the only thing that I like about being in trouble? It's that we get to talk and pray together afterwards." What a sweet perspective that is!  Although she's 7 years old and loves to be super fancy with a heaping ton of lip gloss on at all times and dreams of being a grown-up, she still will wrap herself in our arms and curl up like a little ball of goodness being fully content if we held her there forever, I suppose. 

My Moriyah is quite the young lady, growing in beauty and maturity, always with a book in hand wherever she goes. Her Grandpa David would be proud! She is growing up faster than this mama heart can handle at times and yet the Lord has been teaching me so much about the gift and privilege it is to watch a baby become a beautiful young woman and the treasure it is to walk that walk with her.  I feel like I'm entering foreign territory going from babyhood to tweenhood but in it I'm learning a new dependency on the Lord and it feels a bit adventurous! I really can't wait to see all that the Lord will do in my children and to see the answers to my prayers from these little years.

There are so many beautiful moments that I wish I could remember forever. I think that some things, though forgotten in details, remain in our hearts as they work to build and form us into who we become. Moments become memories that build a legacy into the hearts of our people.  I love my people. I love my moments and memories with them. I've heard someone say, "Mothers are the memory keepers." As much as I wish I was better at documenting it all, the moments I do keep, I treasure. 

lovelove,

Abs